Is everything we feel truly love? Not at all. Often, what feels like love may not be love. Even when we speak of love, there are countless forms it can take. Just as water in the sea, water in a river, water in a glass and water in a bottle are all different, love, too, varies. Love differs depending on the situation, the people involved and the individuals themselves.
Among these diverse forms, two are completely distinct: self-love and narcissism. We can also call them self-affection or self-adoration. They differ greatly in inner meaning, in the influence they create in people, and in the ways they manifest. Which is good love and which is harmful? Let us see.
A person who loves themselves is capable of loving others. Self-love is, therefore, a guide to the strength and ability to love. It arises from a healthy sense of self-awareness. Such a person accepts their own worth and gives themselves the care and respect they need. They recognize their strengths and weaknesses and approach themselves with confidence and compassion. Only those who love themselves can show empathy and kindness toward others, because they see themselves in others. People with self-respect and self-confidence also respect and value others, giving each individual the recognition they deserve. Self-love is, unquestionably, positive.
Narcissism, or self-adoration, is very different. Narcissism gives an excessive sense of self-importance while disregarding others. It is a self-centered attitude of ‘everything is mine’ and ‘I am enough; nothing else matters.’ A narcissist overvalues their appearance, abilities or status and demands endless admiration from others. They ignore others’ feelings and lack empathy. Their relationships are one-sided, driven by self-interest. Criticism frightens them and can destabilize their mental state. Narcissists can be harmful, creating stress and conflict in personal, professional and social relationships.
In summary: self-love nurtures a person, fostering compassion, confidence and a healthy personality. Narcissism, in contrast, creates distorted personalities that harm both themselves and others.
While self-love is a virtue that strengthens and uplifts, narcissism is a condition that negatively affects both oneself and those around.
